So, you think you have slow Wi-Fi? Try living in North Korea, where the internet as we know it simply does not exist. Instead, they have Kwangmyong, a state-controlled intranet that is like the internet’s long-lost, highly monitored, and significantly less fun cousin.
This isn’t just a “bad connection” situation—it’s a government-approved digital playground where the only trending topics are state propaganda and science articles from the early 2000s. Buckle up, because we’re about to take a deep dive into North Korea’s version of the World Wide Web (minus the “world” part).
So, What is Kwangmyong?
Kwangmyong (which means “Bright Light”) is North Korea’s national intranet, designed to give citizens access to a very curated selection of content. Think of it as an exclusive club, but instead of VIP access to global information, you get… pre-approved educational materials and government-run news.
While the rest of the world is doomscrolling Twitter, streaming Netflix, and watching YouTube tutorials on how to make pancakes, North Koreans are browsing:
✅ State-approved news articles (All good things about the government, of course)
✅ Science and technology resources (Probably from 1998)
✅ Digitized North Korean books and papers (Nothing too controversial, obviously)
✅ Email services (Only for the lucky few who have an account)
🚫 No Google, No Wikipedia, No TikTok (Sorry Gen Z)
Basically, it’s the internet if your strictest teacher got to decide what you were allowed to read—and also if there was only one website to begin with.
How Do People Access Kwangmyong?
First of all, not everyone in North Korea can even use it. You need access to a computer, which is already rare, and then you have to be deemed important enough to go online. University students, scientists, and government officials are the usual users. The rest of the population? Yeah, they’re out of luck.
If you do make it onto Kwangmyong, you’ll probably be using it on a 1950s-looking desktop running “Red Star OS”—North Korea’s Linux-based operating system that basically wants to be MacOS but with extra surveillance.
And before you ask: No, there is no Wi-Fi.
People access Kwangmyong through local networks using old-school dial-up or ethernet. Yes, you heard that right—dial-up.
Cue that nostalgic but terrifying modem noise.
What’s Actually on Kwangmyong?
If you were hoping for Reddit threads, funny cat videos, or Wikipedia spirals at 2 AM, prepare to be disappointed. Kwangmyong offers a carefully selected mix of state-run media, outdated scientific reports, and educational content—all written and approved by the government.
💻 News Websites: Expect only positive updates about North Korea and, occasionally, negative stories about “hostile foreign powers” (aka everyone else).
📚 Digital Libraries: Universities and research institutes have access to digitized books and science papers, but let’s be honest—nothing remotely critical of the government will ever make it in.
🎓 Educational Resources: Science and technology pages exist, but they mostly consist of old research and state-approved learning materials.
📧 Email (For a Few Lucky People): Some privileged individuals have email accounts, but don’t expect any Gmail or Yahoo—this is a strictly internal service, and every email is monitored harder than your mom checking your browser history.
The best part? There’s a search engine! But before you get too excited, it only searches within Kwangmyong. So, instead of finding Wikipedia articles or Google results, you’ll probably just get different versions of the same government-approved article.
How Does Kwangmyong Compare to the Internet?
Let’s put it this way: If the internet is an all-you-can-eat buffet, Kwangmyong is that one strict diet meal plan where everything is pre-measured and someone is watching you eat.
Internet vs. Kwangmyong
| Feature | The Internet 🌍 | Kwangmyong 🚫 |
|---|---|---|
| Yes | Nope | |
| Wikipedia | Yes | A censored version, maybe |
| YouTube | Yes | Only in your dreams |
| Netflix | Yes | Not a chance |
| Social Media | Facebook, Twitter, Instagram | HAHAHA, no |
| Online Shopping | Amazon, eBay, etc. | North Koreans have to go outside for that |
| Freedom of Speech | More or less | Try that and see what happens |
| Surveillance | Some, depending on the country | 24/7, always watching |
Basically, Kwangmyong is the “safe mode” version of the internet, except you can never turn it off.
Can Foreigners Access Kwangmyong?
If you’re thinking, “I want to try this just for fun!”—sorry, but unless you’re physically in North Korea (and have government permission), you’re out of luck.
Foreigners visiting North Korea usually don’t get access to Kwangmyong. Instead, they are given a separate, government-monitored Wi-Fi connection that lets them access a heavily restricted version of the global internet. But even that comes with a ton of limits.
Final Thoughts: Kwangmyong, the Internet’s Extremely Monitored Twin
If Kwangmyong had a slogan, it would probably be something like “The Internet, But Make It Government-Approved” or “No Fun, Just Facts (And Only the Facts We Approve).”
While the rest of the world enjoys memes, viral trends, and online debates, North Koreans using Kwangmyong are stuck with a tiny, controlled, and outdated version of the internet that exists mainly to educate, inform, and reinforce government messaging.
So, next time you complain about your slow Wi-Fi, just remember: at least you have Wi-Fi.
Read This Before the Supreme Leader Finds You
Disclaimer: This article is meant for entertainment purposes only (and for satisfying your weird curiosity about North Korea’s internet-that’s-not-really-the-internet). While Kwangmyong is a real thing, access to information in North Korea is a serious issue, and living under a surveillance state is not a meme—even though we made it one. If you’re reading this, congratulations—you have access to an actual internet with memes, cat videos, and the ability to Google “Why is my Wi-Fi so slow?” Just remember: somewhere in North Korea, someone is trying to do the same thing but instead is stuck reading a 20-year-old science article about wheat production. Also, if this article mysteriously disappears one day… you’ll know why. 👀
